5 Tips for Online Dating: First Message Examples for Success

Do you stare forlornly at your online dating inbox and wish it didn’t look so lonely? The good news is that there are a few easy ways to get the ball rolling. Sound unbelievable? Never fear – we’ve got five great examples that will guarantee you’re not left staring at an empty screen. 

Try These 5 First Message Tips

We’ve got a few sure-fire ways to grab attention with your message that won’t seem desperate, needy, or mad. Check out our message examples below for the simple way of making online dating easy!

Add a Little Humour

Introductions during online dating can be a little stale. So many people send a message with a tried and tested formula that can quickly get passed over. Adding in a little humour will certainly get attention and make you stand out from the crowd. That’s the first goal; once you’re chatting, you can win them over with your sparkling conversation! With online dating, it’s all about just having the chance to take things further. 

You could start things with a humorous GIF and let’s face it. There are lots to choose from. Alternatively, you could try a flirty but funny message like this:

– This is an automated message from (insert name of your dating site). We have detected an excess of good looks and desirability. To prevent instant closure of your account, please reply with confirmation of your name, phone number, and whether you want to get Chinese or Indian take-out. 

Be Quirky


If you’ve been online dating a while, you’ll notice that all the messages start to blur into one. Our suggestion above about adding in a little humour can be a lifesaver but if you don’t think you can be downright funny, then just be imaginative. Offering up a creative conversation opener is something anyone can do, and it’s another way to be the profile they notice among the many on the online dating site.

– If you could tame any animal in the world to be your pet, what would it be? I’m thinking a sloth would be an excellent idea. Go ahead and ask me why… Also, what would be yours?

If that’s a little too out there for you, try this message instead:

– I’d love to chat with you but I need to raise a very important subject from the start. It’s close to my heart, and I hope it’s something we can agree on. Pineapple on pizza is just plain wrong – amirite?

Talk About Their Profile

online messaging

Online dating isn’t just the place to wax lyrical about yourself and ignore the person you are trying to woo. If you pay them a genuine compliment or ask a question, you’re much more likely to get a response than simply bragging about how great you are. Check out their dating profile and pick out something that you notice. Bring this up in your message and ask them more about it. If you end up having an online conversation in real-time, using choice elements from their dating profile is an excellent way to keep things flowing. Try these examples:

– The dog in your online profile photo is very cute. I’ve got a dog too, a Labrador called Pickles. What’s your favourite breed?

– I see you’re a keen baker. I love to cook dinner, but I always seem to fail, epically when it comes to making cakes and dessert. Have you got any hot tips that could help?

Pick a Safe Subject

small talk

Many of the messages women receive are sexually loaded or just complimentary about their looks. This can be a real deterrent for online dating as it’s hard to pick out the guys who are genuine, even if the compliment is real. Steer clear of those types of subjects and stick to something much safer. Research shows that talking about food gets a response in 40% of cases, so why not use this as an opener? Here are a couple of examples you could use:

– Brownies, cheesecake, or doughnuts – you can only keep one. What would you choose?

– What’s your perfect Sunday breakfast: a) croissants and OJ b) a full fry-up or c) pancakes?

Just Be Honest

be honest

Whether it’s via online dating or in real life, people are attracted to honesty. Drop the pretences and don’t try to play any games. If you’re honest enough to be yourself and let them know what you’re thinking, you will have their attention. That doesn’t give you permission to be sleazy, even if you’re on a hookup site. The first message should always be courteous and polite while also being direct. 

– I’ve looked at your profile and we have loads in common. I’d love to get to know you. 

– Your online dating profile really made me smile. You’re someone who I’d love to learn more about. 

– You seem really funny – and gorgeous. It would be great to chat with you.

Online dating can be fun and easy when you know what to say. 

If the above examples helped you, share the article on your social media, and head over to our website for more great tips!